Ever feel like your kids’ future is riding on you? Or like you have to be perfect (or at least really good) so that they’ll have an example to follow? Or like God is watching the way that you parent…and that if you blow it, he’s gonna be bummed?
Yeah, me too.
I think I told you about the time Robbie took the SATs. He’d spent most of his childhood playing outdoors, and I couldn’t remember ever seeing him read. Did he know any vocabulary words? I wasn’t sure. And so, in a last-ditch effort to redeem my academic parenting fails and get him prepped for the test, I bought a case of lacrosse balls and turned them into flashcards. If Robbie learned even just two or three words while he played, that might help.
Oh how I wish I’d had Jeannie Cunnion’s new book, Mom Set Free, back then! She could have saved me a lot of angst (and kept me from ruining Robbie’s lacrosse stick, cuz the mesh part turned pink when the Sharpie marker wore off).
As it is, I’m highlighting and starring and underlining pages in Jeannie’s book now. My kids may be grown, but I still need all the help I can get when it comes to rejoicing – and actually relaxing – in the blessing of being a mom.
As the book’s cover proclaims, Jeannie’s heart is to free moms from the pressure to get it all right. Our kids’ future (whether they’re headed to kindergarten or college) is not in our hands, any more than it’s up to us to “make” them honest and kind, strengthen their faith, or protect them from hardship. All of those things – and so many more – are ultimately up to the Lord. He has good plans for them (ideas that are way better than ours, BTW), and as Philippians 2:13 reminds us, it is God’s job (as in, not ours) to work in them to “will and to act in order to fulfill his good purpose.”
Don’t get me wrong. Jeannie isn’t trying to get us to sit back and do nothing. Parenting, she says, is hard work – and it involves discipline and boundaries and consequences. But it also involves grace – huge buckets of grace! – the kind that frees us to discipline and teach and correct our children without relying on anger or scare tactics or shame. As Jeannie sees it, parenting with grace is what lets our kids know (the way that God lets us know), that even when they make unlovable choices, they are still (and forever will be) deeply, unshakably loved.
Ahhhh…there’s so much good stuff in this book. And – whoop! – I actually got to be with Jeannie this week to celebrate the Mom Set Free launch. She was a guest on the 700 Club (click here to watch her interview), and some of my young mom friends came over to my house beforehand to get her warmed up:
To see a clip from that interview, you’ll have to head over to Instagram (@jodie_berndt)…but first, I’ve got some good news. I managed to snag an extra copy of Mom Set Free while Jeannie was here, and I want to give it to someone! Post a comment on this blog and I’ll choose a winner at random (unless you are a patent attorney who thinks that my SAT-word lacrosse balls are marketable product, in which case I will probably pick you).
Seriously, y’all. I love it when I get to recommend a book that combines my two favorite things: Loving my kids and following Jesus. And Mom Set Free is chock full of great verses; I’ll borrow this one from p. 236 and leave you with a parenting prayer:
Lord, you have promised to fight for me. Help me to do what you say and just stay calm! (Exodus 14:14, NLT)
Love all your posts on parenting! Thank you as I continue to need your wisdom and guidance with my son (23 yrs.) and daughter (19 yrs.)!
Cindy, you and I are in the same boat! I think parenting adult children is sometimes even trickier than raising teenagers. All God’s best to you as you love on your son and daughter!
It’s taken a book give-away to spur me to write you and tell you how much I enjoy reading your blogs each week. Whether funny or profound, each one moves me closer to the living God. Thank you, Jodie, and I’d love to give that book to one of my daughters — in fact, if I win, I’ll need to buy a second one because … how could I possibly choose? Both are beautiful young moms who could benefit from not being as uptight as I was when I raised them. 🙂 God bless you and your ministry BIG time!
Sharon, many thanks for the kind comments about the blogs. Your words really encouraged me because I often struggle with whether to be funny OR profound (and I am sure sometimes I am neither!)…and I was blessed to read that both approaches reveal more of our precious Heavenly Father. Thank you! xo
I am definitely an older Mom and Grandmother. I love your blogs and always find a useful, practical tidbit. God has gifted you with so much wisdom and humor to share with others and you probably have no idea how many people you bless all the time. Thank you for sharing with us. I definitely would like to own this book. Daily I need encouragement, hope and guidance for dealing with my own children and those of my friends. I know my daughter would be richly blessed by this book, also. Thank you Jodie of all that you do for the Lord (and for us!)
Awwww Mary, thank you. And we ALL need daily encouragement and guidance, don’t we? You’re a terrific mama – thanks for sharing YOUR wisdom with me!
Jodie,
You don’t know how many people I have recommended read your blog. And they really can’t believe you were my husbands high school girlfriend!
I love how you write, your enthusiasm in everything you do, your humor, and how you ALWAYS turn everything toward the Lord.
Diane, you crack me up. Thanks for recommending the blog…and Rob and I both married UP! 🙂 Loved seeing you at the football game – thanks for making it all the way until halftime!
Oh I hope I’m not too late! I so look forward to your blog posts – always learn something from you! This book sounds perfect for me (as a grandmother to two girls and mother to two girls) and for my daughter as she parents 2 little ones!
Many thanks for the comment, Connie. I’m so glad you like the blog…and you and your daughter would love Jeannie’s book. All God’s best to you and your grandbabies!
Thanks for offering the give away! I first read “Praying the Scriptures for Your Children”years ago when my oldest was about 3. Now she is 19 and our youngest is 5! We also have a 10 yo, 13 yo and 15 yo. I need to get the teenager book AND your upcoming adult children book! I love your writing!
April! You won the book giveaway! Congratulations! I’ll email you with details. And thx for your kind comments re my books…you’re going to love Jeannie, too!
Jodie, I LOVE your blogs and have recommended and forwarded them to so many family members, friends and fellow-praying moms. And, like these other moms and grandmas who have posted so enthusiastically (some of whom I know and love!), I would love to read this book as well as give one to my precious daughter-in-love, now parenting a little one! But mostly I want to tell you how often your words have made me laugh or cry (or usually both!) and always, always increased my love for Jesus and caused me to dig deeper in prayer for those I love. Thank you.
Priscilla! We miss you in Virginia Beach! Thanks so much for the kind comments…I am sure you are THE BEST grandma! Sending love your way…
I would love to win a copy. How fun that you two know each other. I am reading thru your Praying for your teens right. Ow and loved her first book.
Amy, I agree about Jeannie’s first book. Parenting the Wholehearted Child is amazing! And this one is even better! (Thanks for commenting on the post, too!)
If you pick me, I will put it in our church library so the hundreds of other moms in our church can read it. That’s why you should pick me! (P.S. Look, Frank made it to college!)
Haha you are funny! And I loved praying for Frank…thanks again for sending that photo! 🙂