Three Prayers for Your Relationship with Your Children

I’ve been in the studio this week, recording the audiobook version of Praying the Scriptures for Your ChildrenI’m not a professional narrator, but when the publisher asked if I’d consider reading the book’s 20th Anniversary edition, I jumped at the chance. I love getting to “know” other authors by listening to their voice; I hope you do too!

Re-reading the words I wrote nearly 25 years ago brought out all the feels. We’ve kept up with more than a few of the families whose stories show up in the book, and I am humbled (and honestly, a little awestruck) to see how God has worked in answer to prayer. Sure, there have been seasons of heartache—periods when God seemed to be silent or when he didn’t answer our prayers for our children in the way or the timing we wanted him to—but now, with the perspective of time, I can see where those barren months (years, sometimes) served to refine our faith, teaching us to love God more than the gifts he provides. And even as we await the continued unfolding of those long-ago prayers, I marvel at the ways I see so many of our now-grown-up kids walking with God—and even praying the Scriptures for their own little ones! What fun!

One of the things that struck me as I read these decades-old stories is the value of having role models who are a half-step (or more) ahead of us in our parenting journey. One such mentor in my own life was a woman named Myrtie, whose daughter Joanna was one of our kids’ favorite babysitters. I remember marveling at Myrtie and Joanna’s relationship. They seemed almost impossibly close, and as Joanna grew, she consistently affirmed her mom for the godly example she had been to all of her children. Would my kids, I wondered, say the same about me?

Truth be told, I used to look at Myrtie and feel like I could never measure up. No matter how hard I tried to do everything “right,” there were always times when I blew it, when I let my kids down. But Myrtie taught me that that was okay. I didn’t need my kids to look at me, she said; I needed them to look at Jesus.

Over the years, I’ve realized that Myrtie was right:  The more we let our kids see us depending on Jesus for things like wisdom, guidance, and strength, the more they will learn to look past our weaknesses and see God’s provision. They more they will learn to depend on his strength.

The more we let our kids see us depending on Jesus for things like wisdom, guidance, and strength, the more they will learn to look past our weaknesses and recognize God's provision.

If you find yourself where I was—wishing you could undo some mistake, un-say some ugly words, or just have a general do-over because you feel like maybe you’re wrecking your kids—can I just gently remind you of something another mentor told me? God is the Redeemer. And our ability to ruin our kids is nothing compared to his ability—and his desire—to redeem them. And to redeem us.

God’s grace covers all of our failures. He is always at work in our lives, giving us “the desire and the power” to be the moms that he wants us to be. (Philippians 2:13)

Three Scripture-based prayers you can pray

As you allow God to work in and through you to accomplish his best purposes, ask him to connect you with someone like Myrtie, an older woman whose relationship with her children reflects the one you want for your own family. Watch what she does and then follow her lead (à la Titus 2:3-5), turning what you see into prayers. Here are three Myrtie-inspired prayers I prayed when our children were little:

I asked God to give me time with my kids, and to help me spend it wisely. Whether she was crawling around on the floor with her toddlers or taking them on long bike trips when they got older, Myrtie always seemed to prioritize relationships ahead of her agenda (and her phone!). Teach me, I prayed, to recognize how fleeting these days are; help me spend them as I should. (Psalm 90:12)

I asked God to help me see discipline as a gift rather than as a necessary evil. The limits Myrtie imposed on her kids’ behavior when they were growing up were not always popular. But, as she once told me, “You have to be willing for your kids not to like you at any given moment in order to prove to them that you really do love them. Children find security in limits, and they won’t feel as loved if they are always allowed to do anything they want.” May our children see discipline as evidence of our love, I prayed. Let them feel secure in the knowledge that they belong to us, even as we are your true sons and daughters. (Hebrews 12:6-8)

I asked God to show me how to point my kids toward Jesus. Things like time, discipline, and love are all part of strong parent-child relationships, but as Myrtie often reminded me, “The most important thing you can do for your kids is to show and tell them about God’s love.” And as our kids grow closer to Jesus, we will grow closer to one another. Show my children how lavishly you love them, Lord, and turn our hearts toward one another. (1 John 1:3 and Malachi 4:6)

You can read more about building a strong relationship with your children—and discover dozens more ways you can pray—in Praying the Scriptures for Your ChildrenThe audio book releases on April 15, 2025; if you want to access the print version before then, click here. (Or here if you want the hardcover gift edition, perfect for any young moms or dads on your Christmas list.)

Praying the Scriptures for Your Children book with Pumpkins

And if you’ve got older kids, I’ll close with this:  Don’t believe the lie that “the cake is already baked.” God is still writing their stories—and yours. You can find hundreds of prayers for your teens and adult children in my other books, but my favorite all-purpose prayer as I trust God with my grown-up kids is the same verse I pray for myself:

Work in my children, giving them the desire and the power to do what pleases you. (Philippians 2:13)


Myrtie died last year. Rereading her pearls of wisdom in the dim light of the recording booth, I found myself thanking God—yet again—for the gift of her friendship and for all the ways she pointed me toward Christ in my parenting. I don’t know what, exactly, Myrtie is up to in heaven (she used to sing with a group called the Treblemakers; maybe she’s leading an angelic choir?), but I am confident of this:  She is doing what she always wanted her children to do.

She is looking at Jesus.

One thing I ask from the Lord,
    this only do I seek:
that I may dwell in the house of the Lord
    all the days of my life,
to gaze on the beauty of the Lord
    and to seek him in his temple. (Psalm 27:4)

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